Monday, March 3, 2014

You are a super woman, but you can't do it all.


You are Superwoman. Whatever needs doing, you can do it. Someone's tugging on your sleeve asking for you to help with colouring, yes of course you can do that. Dinner needs to be cooked, yeah you've got that handled. Someone rings because a bill is over due, let me just rearrange some funds and get back to you. Oh and work, you can squeeze that in too. You have it all... you can do it all, right?

Hang on, there's still someone hanging off your sleeve asking for help. Damn it. You forgot, but you're Superwoman. You can do this, it's easy.

And anyway... you've got no one else to blame but yourself. You chose this life. You should be able to manage it. And if you can't you have priotitise and cut something loose right? You can do that. You make the hard decisions everyday. You're Superwoman, save the the baby rolling across the road in a pram or save the old lady about to fall into a manhole. What am I talking about? You have superspeed. You can do both!

If you get in the car and it's on empty, just hold your breath and you'll get to school. And when you get there you'll workout a way to turn lunchbox leftovers into petrol. Because you're Superwoman.

Feeling tired? Just drink coffee. Stay away from kryptonite It'll be ok. You slept a few nights ago, you can get by. People need you. You save people. You get things done in record time. You don't need help, no one's offering anyway. You can do this on... your... own.

Where were you? At the shops, harried, with a screaming toddler hanging off one arm and a useless list, you haven't even glanced at, in your other hand. You can't remember what you came to get, only that now your trolley is full of ten jars of peanut butter and a frying pan. But you're Superwoman, you can cram it all in your brain. Don't let the cracks show. And if you forget something you'll just have to go back and embarrassingly pay with a handful of five cent coins you 'borrowed' from your kids moneybox.

And don't forget to take care of your body. You need to look good. You need a flat stomach, long legs, and toned arms. You're Superwoman, you have an image to protect. You can just fit that in while you're on the toilet or shoving leftover toast crusts in your mouth on the way out the door in the morning. You've got it covered.

The big one wants attention, the little one is hungry, tired and screamy all at once. The middle one is shouting at you because her hearing is bad and damn it, did you remember to call the specialist? Did you remember to call the dentist about the sore tooth that the big one complained about a month ago? Yes you did, but then you had to cancel. And somewhere in there, don't you have a partner? A relationship to maintain? You need to remember these things, you're Superwoman, Superwoman doesn't forget things.

Maybe if you could fly you could get it all done. Maybe you could fly away... But no that makes you a bad person, doesn't it? Wanting to escape, even if it's just for a few minutes.

You're Superwoman.

Except...

Suddenly you've shrunk to one tenth your size because there are ten little yous running around trying to be everything to everybody and if one more person asks you for something you might actually be stretched so thin that you disappear into a puff of smoke.

Superwoman, this is what I want you to do. This is what I need you to do: Take a step back. Give yourself permission to snap, scream into a pillow and cry your eyes out. It's ok. It's not the end of the world. And the people who love you will understand. Hell, hopefully they'll hold the punching bag while you get it out of your system. They're super too. They can hold that bag with their super strength while you super punch that bitch til' it bursts.

The idea of protecting yourself can be seen as selfish but if you can't, you can't. You're not a bad person. You're human and you need to give yourself a break.